Whew! And I thought I was crazy;)
Now, I’m a sociologist, mostly a criminologist. So, I’m not a not a developmental psychologist nor a social psychologist. And my wife and I don’t have any human children (we did the dogs/cats route), so I didn’t read a bunch of books on child rearing. And although this ARTICLE wasn’t that surprising nor earth-shattering, I thought it provided a nice context to my childhood (yes, I played with sticks, played guns, in forts, trees and vacant lots, etc.). I love how this article drives home ideas of social learning and development. I’m always amazed how we navigate through the various moments of our lives, especially early on, and how social learning is such a vital part of our lives. Anyway, thoughts?
This article offers valuable insights into the behaviors of boys and their preferences for certain activities. As a mother of three boys, I often observe them engaging in activities such as playing with swords or wrestling. This article helps me understand that these activities involve the establishment of rules and power dynamics. Additionally, as a mother of two girls, I’ve noticed that my daughter also tends to play rough and wrestle with the boys. It seems like she, too, is trying to figure out her power dynamics. This raises the question of whether, as parents, we inadvertently influence our children to conform to traditional gender roles during playtime.
This article makes me think of kittens and puppies play fighting. I used to do the same kind of thing as a kid, rough housing with my siblings. As someone who’s interested in both sociology and psychology, it’s really cool to see how these simple, playful moments are actually helping kids figure out social rules, power dynamics, and how to manage their emotions. The article is potentially insightful to parents who might be worried when they see this behavior in their children and ease their minds. It mentioned several specific social skills kids develop from this kind of play.
It makes me think about how much we need to learn socially to interact within society the way we do. We exert so many skills every day without even thinking about it.
I thought that this article touched on something that I had never put much thought into before. Growing up with brothers, I was always accustomed to watching them ‘rough house’ and play ‘good guys and bad guys’. I really enjoyed reading about the psychology behind this “playful aggression”. I think that too often than not, parents will try to protect their children from almost too much, while not realizing the benefits of this type of play such as verbal and social skills, relationship hierarchies, and self expression. I also thought it was interesting that this type of play is mostly seen in boys, whereas girls role play in more of a maternal/nurturing role. Speaking from experience, I definitely agree that while boys express anger physically, girls revert to using words to hurt someone else. Lastly, I found it quite interesting that there is no scientific link between aggressive role playing and aggression as an adult. This makes me wonder what behaviors aggressive adults exhibited when they were children. Overall, this article shed light on topics that I had not thought about and made me want to start to pay attention to how children around me are expressing playful aggression.
I love this article it also reminds me of the Bobo Doll Theory! I think aggressive behavior is normal in humans at any age. Exposure to violent environments, even if they are fictitious (such as video games or programs), and especially without adequate supervision, makes it easier for aggressive or violent responses to normalize, so it is important to take care of what children (or everybody in general) see, hear, and live, especially in the early stages of childhood. When children spend a lot of time in contact with violent content, their brain continues to work at the same intensity even after stopping it so it is important to encourage instead activities that stimulate imagination, creativity, and friendly social exchange with other children.
I found this article interesting, as I just finished reading a book arguing for the importance of “risky play.” Risky play involves allowing children to play, unsupervised, in a manner where they could hurt themselves in some manner. Participation in risky play allows children to learn how to take risks, how to navigate interactions with other children, and that their actions have consequences. This article seems to enforce that idea, as the author discussed how playful aggression contributes positively to children’s emotional and social development. However, when I worked at a daycare this summer, some of the boys constantly wrestled with each other and did not know when to stop. If they had been my children, I might have let them wrestle so they could learn boundaries and their limits. But, their parents did not appreciate all the bumps and bruises they earned as a result of that activity, so I had to attempt to prevent the wrestling.
I found this article to be super interesting! As a psych major, I am sad to say that I had no idea that this kind of play was considered a “good” thing. When around young boys engaging in this type of play, you always hear parents tell them to “knock it off” or to “quit doing that before you hurt someone”. I do really like how the article mentions that this type of play lets children discover boundaries, as in who to befriend, who to avoid, and the successful boundaries of play. It’s also interesting that they mention that girls also engage in this type of play. From what I can remember from my childhood, I was always pretending that I was a horse and even tried to run around like one (which is super embarrassing now that I think about it). I find myself grabbing cool sticks and pretending they’re Harry Potter wands now that I’m older instead of when I was a kiddo. This was a super interesting article to read though, thanks for sharing!
I personally don’t have any kids but I did grow up with a little brother who always liked to play rough so me and him would wrestle each other. And because I was stronger and 3 years older, he would get upset at times because I was too rough on him and I’d win. Besides the point this article is still interesting whether you have kids or not. If you are going into education, It would be important to know how boys can be and why you should let them play the way they usually do unless one of them isn’t having fun then thats when a parent or a teacher should be concerned. In the article it says, “Relationship hierarchies are complex, but focus on power and who is in charge. During episodes of playful aggression, this might mean taking control, giving in to someone else’s idea, or sharing power. These hierarchies allow children to make decisions about who they want to play with, who to avoid, or how to adapt their behaviour to create friendships” (Maryna, 2024). As Kaia mentioned, working at a school/daycare could be different because you are the teacher and not the parent so it makes sense to stop playful aggression once it becomes more than that – bruises, bumps, etc.
Reading this article definitely brought back my own memories as a child as I tried to put myself back into my old shoes. Having an older brother a couple of years older than me I did whatever he liked, and that certainly involved sword fighting and roughhousing. Yet with my friends, I partook in the caregiving roles when we played pretend games. I think roughhousing teaches kids to set their own boundaries and communicate with other kids, and roleplaying with swords and guns feels similar to the thrill of playing action video games. Kids also just want to make friends and discover new interests, and it keeps them physically active as well.
This article reminded me that I was the only girl growing up with all boy cousins. We spent every moment outside playing and learning about our environment. The boys were rougher with each other but I learned to give as good as I got. It never felt wrong to have fake battles with each other, dirt-clod fights, raiding each other’s cache of goods, and comforting each other when things got out of hand. When I became a mother and raised girls I never stopped the girls from being outside but they didn’t have the boys to roughhouse with. I wonder now if they missed a key learning experience.
This article was extremely interesting to me because I grew up playing Cowboys and Indians with my sister. We would pretend to hunt each other on our horses, and we would even carry around toy guns and bows and arrows. Now don’t get me wrong I loved playing with dolls too. It does seem that boys prefer to play with Nerf guns and they like pretending they are dragons. I think that is in their nature, but I also feel like it could be how some kids are raised. If I had never been around horses or seen cowboy movies, then I would have probably played with dolls and never toy guns. I think it is beneficial to see that it is just in boys’ nature to be somewhat aggressive when playing. It is also nice to know that boys playing aggressively when they are younger has nothing to do or does not contribute to them being aggressive adults.
The article highlights how behaviors like playful aggression are essential for kids’ development, helping them learn about power and relationships. I can relate to memories of playing with sticks and creating make-believe battles, as it’s a natural part of growing up. I do believe it’s important for parents to understand that this kind of play isn’t about teaching violence, but rather about social skills and creativity. The differences in how boys and girls play can stem from both biology and upbringing, which is fascinating. Allowing kids to engage in playful aggression helps them learn important life lessons, so instead of discouraging it, parents should support their kids’ imaginative play. I believe that this can go for more “violent” video games, as well.
I love this article and hope more people will see it. I have 4 children-2 boys and 2 girls and they have all been homeschooled. We have always spent about 2 hours give or take a day at formal, sit-down style learning, but I have always said that my kids learn so much from play. I believe that all play has value and this article has highlighted that so well. If you don’t learn how to find a boundary by crossing a few at a younger age, then you may be too late to learn it later. Additionally, unless my kids have been outright causing real physical harm or using really targeted hurtful language, the family is the safest place to learn when too much is too much and I try not to intervene. They may be young, but they have voices and they inherently know how to use them when nurtured.
Michael Nagel (2024) provides valuable insights into why boys engage in playful aggression, taking the role of relationship hierarchies into account and examining why playful aggression differs between boys and girls. One aspect of the article that significantly stuck out to me regarding playful aggression was that boys’ play revolves around themes related to power, whereas girls take a more tend-to-befriend approach and focus on nurturing themes in their play. After having worked with kids for a couple of years, I have seen these themes occur during natural environment play, as when I am working one-on-one with younger boys, they always want to play action-packed games, such as pretending we’re stuck in a bad location and need to fight bad guys to get out. However, working with girls has had this opposite effect, especially as many bring their toys in and want to play games such as “House,” where we pretend their stuffed animal, toy, etc., is a part of the family that we have to take care of. Overall, it is very interesting to see how playful aggression differs between boys and girls, and how they use external objects to reinforce various themes of play.
I think that “playful aggression” as well as play where females practice nurturing roles reinforce some harmful stereotypes within our society. For example, the idea that men have to be heroes and that they need to protect what is theirs, and the idea that women should be submissive and focus on taking care of their families. The article points to the interaction of nurture and nature as the reason behind this gendered play. However, I think it underestimates the unconscious socialization that children experience through watching their parents. Females see their mothers have children, cook, and clean, so they are inclined to copy that behavior when role-playing.
If we could teach female children to practice aggressive play, they may be able to learn some valuable lessons from it, just like males do. For example, how to stand up for oneself or how to deal with conflict. Overall, the article is interesting, but I think it is disregarding the gendered socialization that children experience.
I found this article to be very interesting and it gave great insight to behavior that is seen in early childhood. I have a younger brother, and I was able to relate this behavior to when he was little. He often used playful aggression with his friends. This kind of behavior can be useful for the development of children. I also thought it was interesting how the article explored the differences between boys and girls in early childhood. As a child I often engaged in games with my sister, and we would take on nurturing roles when playing with our dolls. The way boys and girls play is not concrete. Boys can enjoy playing with dolls and girls can enjoy playing outside with sticks. But we can use this article to see how one’s childhood can impact their development.
I think this article really highlights a lot of important things! As a mentor for youth, I can say that this also offered some insight that has allowed me to better understand why, in a roundabout way, kids do some of the things that they do. I think it is interesting the different views on more rambunctious and rough play. Often times this sort of behavior is frowned upon whether it’s due to location or parents worrying about the kid’s safety. Then you have the others who say, “its good for them!” and instigate the kids further. I agree that to a certain extent this type of play is good and allows kids to just have fun and be kids! The mention of the differences in boys and girls was interesting too. Growing up as a tomboy and always running around barefoot, wrestling in the grass with the boys, and overall being a menace was something you didn’t always see a lot of girls doing. I think it was importantly noted that just because of the sex of the child, doesn’t mean they necessarily play in different ways. I think the way that kids do interact with each other, regardless of boy or girl, does in fact impact numerous things in both development and later in life. I don’t think I would be as outdoorsy as I am now if it weren’t for the way I played and had fun as a kid!